Stress Levels

My stress levels are rising.

I am a bit past the midterm point in the summer quarter, and the typical tension and dread of pending finals is approaching. This seems to be a common occurrence for me lately. The concern has always been unfounded in the end, however. That is the reasonable, rational side of me talking. Usually that side is in control. Come test time, however, the emotional, panicky part of my mind kicks into overdrive.

Biology class is going well enough. I am keeping up with the class work, and the study guides are a great help. Plus, I have someone willing to help out with my understanding of plant physiology. The biggest concern I have right now is the simple volume of information I need to keep track of.

Then there's my calculus class. My scores this quarter seem to be running counter to my understanding of the content. The first test, I thought I had a firm grasp on the concepts. My scores amounted to a high "C." The second test, I had no clue what I was doing, and somehow manages a low "A." This time around, I thought I knew the subject matter fairly well, but my homework assignment came back as a high "D." That is not a score I'm used to seeing. With that score in mind, I thought I would run a practice test to see what I needed to work on. Unfortunately, I aced the practice tests. What the hell? Clearly I was doing something wrong in the homework, but failed to generate a sufficient study plan for the test. With the final about two weeks away (holy shit, only two weeks?), I am doubting an online course was the best plan of action here.

I don't have an adequate release for this stress. I went out for a walk, but my over-active mind actually managed to increase my anxiety level, and not just from academic concerns. I managed to pick out three distinct instances of police sirens in the neighborhood, plus one patrol car with a driver that seemed very curious as to why a grizzly bear was dressed in people clothes, wandering around a residential neighborhood muttering about complex numbers and vector magnitudes.